cassidy

Honoring a commitment is something that I believe in. I realized its importance sometime in college when my dad told me straightforwardly, that if you say you're going to do something, you should keep your word. I have always remembered that, because he said it so firmly; I knew that he believed what he was saying, and lived accordingly.


In my daily life, my top commitments are to my school, to Weezie, and to my health. Subsequently, there is no certainty of who I will see (Weezie, excluded) on a weekly basis, outside of school. Or bi-weekly, or monthly. However, there is one exception, which I consider to be a tremendous blessing. She is Cassidy.


12 weeks ago, I made a commitment to taking semi private, weekly pilates classes from my best friend from highschool, Cassidy. I take with another best friend, Karen, too. If I am in town, I am there, and I love that I have the class in my life, and that I see Cassidy (and Karen) at a certain time, at a certain place, on a certain day, every week.  Something about order is just so comforting. I look forward to that class all week.


Well, I love Cassidy, and I want to tell you one of the reasons why.
We have a maybe 2 or 3 quick side stories during our lessons every week. They are not time consuming, just quick moments of relief, and provide a small distraction to our minds, from the burn in our gleutes. Cassidy's story today had me dying.


Take in mind, some details about Cassidy:
While I would not call her shy, she is not at all overly wordy. No one would ever think to call Cassidy loud or anything like that. Very down to earth, and grounded. Non-judgemental and open minded, and interested in what people have to say.


So anyway, yesterday, her husband, John had some returns to do at American Apparel. Some of you may not be familiar with the chain retail store, but it's very trendy, and popular. While American Apparel is a store that caters equally to men and women, their ads feature women exclusively, and are many of them are quite provocative and risque. So, Cassidy is in there browsing, and one of their ads caught her eye. I have not seen the said photograph, but Cassidy claims that it features a model's vagina. Cassidy felt upset to see this image and here is how she responded:


 She took the ad in her hand and she marched up to the counter and said: "this is disgusting. Do you see this?! this is her vagina. I can't believe this. This is degrading to women. You all oughtta be ashamed of this." and then she walked out.


To me, this seems both oddly, totally in character of Cassidy, but also VERY shocking. I mean, that's some prime material. You don't see people my age doing this kind of thing on a normal basis. And "normal" people my age, saying this kind of stuff. She went on with the story, saying that "poor John was still in the middle of the returns" when she went all crazy on them. And she said "those poor hipster girls" probably had no idea what to do or say. Apparently, the employees were defending the photo by saying "it was just the lighting" that made it look like genitalia. Oh man, I have got to see this photo.


She also noted that the worst ( but the best, in my opinion) part of all of it was that she kept repeating herself, in her outrage.


I just want to say that I feel what Cassidy did was respectable. To believe in something, is a beautiful thing. I want people in my life that think things, and think them hard. To the point where they are outraged when that thing is violated. This story, written, may make Cassidy sound judgemental, but this was not in that spirit. Her words were not  spoken out of judgement, just out of the ideals that she holds for the culture in which she lives. Jokingly, i told Cassidy that tomorrow I want to go in there and try to completely replay her reaction to the ad, just to have a little fun. Maybe I will, just for the experience saying something to a stranger with such passion. I think that the way she is living is how I want to live too. To respect the gift of a voice, by letting it be heard. I love this quote by Abraham Lincoln:


"To sin by silence when they should protest makes cowards of men. "


Cassidy may not change American Apparel's marketing campaigns, but I'd like to think that she may have enlightened the viewpoint of someone present for this exchange. I don't care that much about what it is that you particularly believe in, whether its in unicorns, or your imaginary friend, or whatever. But I hope that my friends recognize their beliefs. Believing is a symptom of love, I think, so when you believe in something it's a sign of a good life.


While I don't know if I find the photo immoral, I do find the photo to be indecent. I do find its place in such a mainstream (American Apparel certainly would not be happy to know that they are considered by some to be "mainstream"), successful and popular store to be evidence of a lost and broken culture. When I think about the photo, I disagree with its subtext. My pure gut reaction to what she saw will always be a mystery now, but I do find vicarious happiness in her freedom and assurance to be bold and say how she felt.


The world is a better place because of people like Cassidy, and I consider myself a lucky one to have her scheduled in my life, once a week. Its good for me.


And I am glad that someone of my generation is so bold to "give a care"; it makes me feel good about us.


I'll leave you with Honest Abe's other quote on silence, that makes me question this blog's existence. 


'Tis better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."